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> What Are You Asking? -May 2007
 


Tom Ehrich
Tom Ehrich

 
   

What are You asking?

Pastor, Author and Speaker Tom Ehrich responds to
your questions about God, faith and
living spiritually

Send us your questions


 

MAY 2007


My preachers are always picturing God as a parent. But parents like mine manipulate, humiliate...[abuse and greatly damage] their children….There are some 600 acts of violence attributed to God in the Hebrew Bible alone. My priest says they are not important because the preponderance of the story is about reconciliation. I have no experience of reconciliation with anyone in my life, only humiliation, submission, and capitulation. Just because my priest loves his children, he thinks I should love God. I don't think there is a God anymore!

I sympathize with your pain and confusion as, it seems, a child of abusive parents. I hope you are seeking counseling for the matters you describe, so that you can move on from them and live a full adult life.

Yes, you are quite right in saying that Scripture describes all manner of behavior that we hope isn’t indicative of God’s nature. The Scriptures were written many ages ago by men and women who looked at their unique historical circumstance and saw in it the mighty hand of God. Thus, if they were at war with their neighbors, God must be in that war with them. If they had a patriarchal culture, then God must be in that with them.

It is artificial to view such writings as expressing the nature of God. They say more about the nature of God’s people.

Jesus told a different story. Echoing prophets like Isaiah, Jesus spoke of God as one who shows mercy and desires justice and peace. He urged his followers to forgive their enemies and to live lives grounded in love, not revenge.

Reconciliation is a difficult journey, and little in this world seems to affirm it. The more common messages are hatred, division and revenge. For the good of your own heart and soul, however, I urge you to embark on that journey of reconciliation. It is the very road that I believe Jesus walked.


Prior to Pentecost, was there a "Holy Spirit"?

Both Old Testament (Jewish Bible) and New Testament make reference to a “spirit of God” in stories that precede the Day of Pentecost. The Creation story in Genesis 1, for example, says “a wind from God swept over the face of the waters,” using a word for “wind” that can be translated as “spirit.” The Gospel of Luke says that after his baptism, Jesus, “full of the Holy Spirit,” returned from the Jordan and was led by that Spirit into the wilderness to be tested by Satan.

The early Church fought over this—as they fought over many things—because church leaders wanted Jesus to be supreme and for the Spirit to issue from him, not to precede him. The Bible seems to make it clear, however, that the Spirit of God was a dimension of God’s being from the beginning. Some think the Spirit is the feminine aspect of God’s being and might, therefore, be synonymous with “Wisdom.”


I have a friend who is leaning toward a new life with Christ but still has his doubts. I pray for him every day. How do I respond to a comment such as this: People use faith and/or Jesus as a crutch for when things aren't going well or right.  Is that a bad thing or is it an unbeliever thinking you have to do everything on your own?

It is good of you to pray for your friend. Remember two things: doubts are healthy, and his faith journey will be unique and, in all likelihood, different from yours. Christian faith isn't a “cookie-cutter” process from which all faithful people emerge the same.  

People “use” faith for many negative purposes, such as wielding power over another person, feeling superior to others, finding easy answers to difficult questions, excluding all but the like-minded, and lapsing into a child's dependency. Is turning to God during tough times a negative purpose? I don't think so. Jesus said we are blessed when we know our need of God. What shows us that need more convincingly than tough times or personal failure?

I encourage you to ask what your friend means by using the word “crutch” to describe such awareness of need. He could be recoiling from common perceptions that Christians are weak and dependent beings who only turn to God when they need a fix. You can share with him from your own witness that knowing one's need of God and turning to God can be good things.


In the Bible it says that if a wife asks her husband to pray that they are supposed to pray. Does that apply to all?

Prayer needs to be freely chosen, not compelled. Prayer is an alignment of the heart and mind with God. If that is forced upon someone, the alignment is likely to be artificial.


It was discussed in Bible study group that we have the same power (the power to work miracles, heal the sick, cast out demons et cetera) that the apostles had, but we just don't have the faith.  Is there any evidence in the Bible that anyone other than the apostles had this power?

Ministries of healing were a critical component of the early Church's mission. They are mentioned by Paul, Acts, James and the Gospels. I am less familiar with the role that healing played in the years after 150 AD, when the Epistle of James was written, the latest writing included in the canon of the New Testament. Prayers for healing have been a standard part of church ministry, as well as anointing with oil and the laying on of hands.

The answer to all prayers is God's to determine, not ours. I don't believe that God is persuaded or dissuaded by the fervor of our prayers. God is love, whether or not we have a faith as big as a mustard seed or smaller or greater.

Modern science and medicine have expanded our understanding of illness. At the time of Jesus, many believed that all illness was caused by demon possession. One primary goal of early Christians' healing was to drive out demons. We now have a more informed understanding of illnesses such as cancer and heart disease and see physical healing differently. Mental and emotional healing, however, seem very much within the purview of prayer, not because they are caused by demons, but because the warmth, love and physical touch that usually accompanies healing prayers can bring mental calm and emotional wholeness to a person.


Is there any truth to angels? Where does the Bible stand? Can angels change a person's life?

The Bible speaks of angels in two senses. The first is of angels as “messengers,” like the angel who announced to Mary that she would bear God's Son. The other is of angels as an assembly of beings who surround God and sing his praises, like members of a royal court.

In the life of the Church, angels have taken on additional meanings, mainly having to do with their serving as intermediary between ourselves and God. For example, the Bible says that God loves us. How do we know that love? One way, according to old tradition, was that God sends angels to watch over us—hence, the “guardian angel”—as God sent angels to protect Jesus.

Some believers report having intense experiences of angels. Others don't have such experiences. To my mind, angels are part of the mystery of a God whose ways are not our ways and who allows nothing to come between himself and humanity. Just because I have never experienced the “angelic host” doesn't mean that God couldn't choose to use such beings to convey love and hope to us.

Read more about angels


I know that when we go to God that we must have faith, but it’s hard for me. I have talked to people but all they tell me is to believe, but my faith is weak. It makes asking God for things to happen in my life hard…Sometimes I feel like God is mad and will not do what I ask him to do. I wish I was like those who have strong faith. Do you think this could be because I don’t feel good about myself? I talked to my mom about it, but all she tells me is ether you believe or you don’t.

I think we go to God because we have needs and because we have an empty place that only God can fill. Paul said God has planted in all of us a spirit that cries out to God as “Abba! Father!”

Faith will come later. Faith isn’t a precondition for turning to God. Faith arises as we become aware that God is loving us and hearing us. Faith, in other words, isn’t an accomplishment that gives us permission to pray , but the consequence of having approached God.

Feeling good about oneself, in turn, comes with maturing, learning, and, I believe, with knowing that God loves you.


My Mom is Lutheran, and I am Baptist...My son is 6 years old and is getting baptized. I invited my mother to come, and she said she did not think he understood what he was doing. I told her he had accepted Jesus into his heart and he understood what Jesus did for us. She says she believes there is a God, but she does not believe everything in the Bible. How can that be? Can you explain the difference is in our religions? Also can you tell me where I can go to look up different religions to help me understand their beliefs?

The Protestant Reformation took many forms, some associated with the rise of nationalism in the 15th Century and beyond, and some associated with various doctrinal systems. The Lutheran tradition began in Germany and spread to other nations (e.g. Norway, Sweden, Finland), where Lutheran tradition became the primary national church opposed to Roman Catholicism. Other European nations had similar developments (such as the Church of England). Each developed somewhat differently, but they had in common a decision to worship in the native tongue (rather than Latin) and to break all ties to Rome.

Those national churches, in turn, spawned other movements, such as Puritanism and Methodism in England. The Baptist tradition is an outgrowth of the Puritan movement.

When European colonists came to the New World, they brought their national churches with them. Here they lived side by side, sometimes peaceably, sometimes not. German settlements tended to establish Lutheran churches where German was spoken. Norwegians did the same with Norwegian-language Lutheranism. In some areas it wasn’t uncommon to have several national flavors of Lutheranism, plus one or more English-language churches, plus Roman Catholic churches serving French, Italian, Portuguese and English speakers. As immigrants assimilated, most churches gravitated to English.

That’s the history. Doctrine, meanwhile, took many forms, too. The so-called “mainline” churches (Lutheran, Presbyterian, Episcopal and Methodist) adopted the “higher criticism” approach to Biblical studies, an outgrowth of German scholarship and the discovery of many additional ancient manuscripts. The so-called “evangelical” churches (such as Baptist) resisted the higher criticism and moved in the 20th Century toward fundamentalism and a belief in Biblical literalism.

Unfortunately, Christians in America have allowed these doctrinal differences to become obstacles to mutual respect and collaboration. It is highly unlikely that God cares how much water is used at baptism, for example, or that one form of Biblical interpretation can express all that God wants to say. You are experiencing one instance of that tragedy, as doctrine gets in the way of a significant family event. The only way forward, in my opinion, is for us to stand down from our doctrinal high-horses, learn mutual respect, and remember that Jesus called for oneness, not right-opinion.

Your mother’s views on Scripture aren’t inconsistent with Lutheran teaching, nor are yours inconsistent with Baptist teaching. Is one of you right and the other wrong? I doubt it. Besides, as Paul said in 1 Corinyhians 13, what does it profit us to be right if we cannot love each other?

Handy sources of information for understanding different Christian traditions include Wikipedia and reference.com. From there you can go deeper.


I was a Baptist for 20 years and have dropped out and really don't associate myself as believing in any one religion. What is your opinion of what a Christian is? Does a Christian have to worship Jesus?

People offer differing opinions about what it means to be a Christian. I think a Christian is one who believes that Jesus is Lord and that his life, death and resurrection form the basis of our living relationship with God. Some will worship Jesus within the Church, which is composed of many denominations and many ways of believing. Some will form a relationship with Jesus outside the Church, through prayer, study, meditation, or mission.

Belief in Jesus can take many forms, from acceptance of certain doctrines promulgated by faithful people over the centuries, to a less structured awareness of oneself as one whom Jesus loves and considers a “friend.” I see faith as a journey, not a single destination. That journey, like all journeys, has high and low points, times of intense awareness and times of feeling nothing, times of clarity and confusion, purpose and wandering. God beckons us on, and so, with Jesus as our model of what it means to go, we do our best.


I take care of my mother, who has Alzheimer's. Other Christians I know have praised me for my sacrifice by saying things like, "Oh, you'll get a crown when you get to heaven," or "Blessings will increase tenfold for you." These same people also intimate that I have selfish motives. My own feelings are that this praise is undeserved because... I don't always have charity in my heart when she says the most vile and hurtful things...When your mother tells you she wished you were never born, it puts a huge hole in your heart... and I'm afraid I'll react negatively. I'm such a sinner that I feel that this task I'm doing is one of my life's tests. How can I accept praise from others when I feel that God will never have a good judgment for me?

People say the oddest things when they want to put some distance between your agony and their comfort. You can hear the same “pastel phrases,” as I call them, in funeral parlors. “God must have wanted her more,” and nonsense like that. I encourage you to ignore your friends’ words, whether they praise you or criticize you. If they want to help, let them sit with your mother for an afternoon and give you a break.

Alzheimer’s is a disease, mysterious and frightening, often horrible in its impact on the patient and her loved ones. It isn’t a punishment from God, for anything the patient did or anything you are doing or not doing as a caregiver. Nor is it a test to see how faithful and good you are. Whether you are 100 percent selfless, or 50 percent, or 10 percent, you are doing the best you can, and your gift of love is more than your mother would receive otherwise. Please ease up on yourself and do what you can do. Some days that will be more and some days less.

Finally, I encourage to seek a support group for family members of Alzheimer’s patients. Only they can understand what you are going through. Hearing their similar stories will help you to have perspective on your mother’s hurtful behavior.

 

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To learn more about Tom Ehrich’s writings, visit www.onajourney.org.
 


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